Stuff happens. Life happens. Feelings are hurt. People smile. People cry. Life is a whirl wind of feelings and heartache. I know that. I have many losses in my life. I have many joys too.
I have so many things happening in my mind at all times that sometimes the hurt and pain comes to the top and runs my life for a few days. It becomes a very difficult few days to live through but I make it through and move onto better things.
It seems to me that I crave joy and happiness at all times. I enjoy my times alone..which are rare ..so I can read a good book and imagine my life differently. But to me coming back to life after that dreaming sometimes is difficult too. I go and work on my crafty stuff making cards and different projects but I don’t always feel like it is enough. I miss having very close friends. Many of mine have moved on, had children of their own and I don’t hear from them as much anymore. I miss being able to walk across town to my best friends home and spending all my time there. Calling her parents Mom and Dad just as I did my own. I guess growing up does this to a person.
The weather here has been very dreary and rainy so I think this also plays a part in my sadness. I need the sun!
I plan on working on some cards and just enjoying the evening with my family tonight. Hopefully the slugs on our back stoop will go away too! 
Glad that you sound a bit better. One thing that seems certain these days: rain! Our porch is turning green.